Thursday, December 18, 2008

Emma

Next on our Jane Austen fesitval of blogs is her work entitled Emma. It is the story of a young woman [yes, Emma IS her name, way to pay attention] and her crazy urge to match people up. It's not so much out of an ideal of bringing people happiness, but just so she'll have something to do and be able to point out her good work. She's arrogant, snobby, stuck-up, and....yeah, that's about it. Oh, and she's very rich. And yet, we kinda like her...
Anyway, she meets this girl Harriet Smith who is a poor orphan with no idea who her parents are or what her situation is. Emma decides Harriet needs a man and so she sets out to find one for her, persuading Harriet to turn against the only guy who has ever treated her well because he's "not good enough" for her. Things get WAAAAAY messed up when Mr. Elton the clergyman makes his true feelings known, and then Frank Churchill shows up and everything goes bonkers again as people make assumptions and judgements, and then there's the insulting thing at BVox Hill with Jane Fairfax....
Did I mention there IS a good guy here? His name is Mr. Knightly and he is basically perfect. He's known Emma since she was a baby and he is kinda like an older brother to her, complete with scoldings and blunt opionions. His brother married her sister, but other than that there is no connection... Anywho, he's great....
I really can't say much about this one, guys. It's one of those every surprise just makes it better, and if you know the surprise, it just ruins it. But I do love this book and if you can get around Jane's funny way of saying things, you'll see that it's actually quite witty and sometimes downright hilarious.

If Hollywood is more your style, go with the Gwenyth Paltrow version. Knightly is good looking.

If you prefer the BBC, go with the Kate Beckinsale version. Knightly is mysterious and bold.

Or if your tastes run musical, try and catch Emma the Musical if it comes your way! Knightly...can sing.....

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

BREAKING NEWS!!!

We interrupt your regularly scheduled blogpost to announce Becky's discovery of an amazing singing group that has officially taken over her life. Il Divo. It's a boy band but it's OPERA! Well, sort of, but it's definately classical! They are AMAZING, not to mention pretty good looking, and they were organized by Simon Cowell, so you KNOW they're good. Their harmonies are amazing, and the notes on perfect pitch, and it just gives you chills.
Amazing amazing amazing, you all should investigate and become converted.

That's all.

Cue heavenly angels.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Northanger Abbey

Today we are going to approach--but not really go into--the subject of Jane Austen's least popular book, Northanger Abbey. Why it is the least popular is a subject for huge debate which I shall not attempt to address, except that I think it's a lack of true character development except for our heroine. But that's just me.
This story is the "dark and mysterious" of Jane's novels, which may be another reason it isn't as popular, as she should stick to semi-realistic sensible romatics, but anyway. Our heroine is Catherine Morland, who, like so many of us, has more romantic imaginations than she knows what to do with. She's very innocent, but thinks she knows much as far as romanticism goes. She goes with some friends to Bath and meets a sister of her brother's friend, who, it turns out, is engaged to her brother, go figure. They become friends, and this friend (I think her name is Isabella) is someone that you don't like right from the getgo and you have no idea why our lovely and likeable Catherine is friends with. She's shallow, base, and utterly irritating. Her brother tries to make some moves on Catherine, causes her to lose the opportunity to go out with the handsome and charming (and all-around good guy) Mr. Tilney. Somehow she discourages the jerk and Mr. Tileny and his sister end up inviting her to their home, Northanger Abbey. Dark and mysterious is the place, haunted by the ghost of the late Mrs. Tilney, whose demise is a subject for further investigation, in Catherine's mind. The fact that their father is a crazy miserly creepy old dude doesn't help matters either.
Catherine's imagination goes wild, and that's what leads to the rift between our potential lovers. That and the fact that Mr. Tileny's dad found out she';s poor and basically had her cast from the house...


If you really care all that much, read the book. It's not so bad, really.


This is a decent version...if you like creepy 80's adaptations.

This one is REALLY good. I enjoyed it very much. It made me just about like the story. Oh, who am I kidding, this version MADE the story for me. Watch it! It's the BBC.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Sense and Sensibility

This one is one of my favorite Jane Austen books. It's also one of the most popular. They made a major movie out of it and it won an Oscar, for cryin' out loud! But you really can't go wrong with the cast they chose. I mean, Emma Thompson, Kate Winslet, Greg Wise, Hugh Grant, AND Alan Rickman? Can we SAY score? Yes, we can.
Anyway, the story: two sisters, Elinor and Marianne Dashwood, are at the center of the book. Thier father has just died, leaving his estate and most of the fortune to his only son, as was the way of things back then. So they, their mother, and their youngest sister Margaret are left virtually penniless and at the mercy of their half-brother and his shrew of a wife. But the shrew's brother comes to stay with them, and Elinor and Edward form a wonderful friendship with hints and definite undertones of something more. But both are reserved, which ticks Marianne off as she is impulsive and emotional, and so nothing is ever actually official. Then the Dashwood girls and their mom go to her cousin's cottage in Devonshire to live, leaving Edward (and Elinor's heart?) behind. They meet some real characters, who are determined to figure out Elinor's secret, but they have a friend, Colonel Brandon, a handsome, but very reserved and somber older man, who is enchanted by Marianne immediately. But naturally, she doesn't see it, dreaming of some high acventuring love. Her chance comes when she sprains her ankle one rainy day and is rescued by the dashing and mysterious Mr. Willoughby. Sparks of romance, interest, and even passion flare as the two set the countryside up in rumors about their behaviors. But nothing is simple, is it? Marianne flies with her heart to guide her, while Elinor's head keeps her heart in closed quarters. Elinor's wisdom comes in handy when someone confides in her certain secrets that destroy her hopes of any happiness beyond her present, and Marianne's blissful ignorance of the world brings about her painful downfall as her life crumbles. How will they recover from their troubles? How can this possibly end happy?

Don't be a goose, of course it does, but I'm not telling. But there are lessons in this book to apply to life, as there are in all. Read it. Watch it. Love it.

The new BBC version, which is good, but really, after this one:

nothing else will ever be able to do. Love love love love. Ideal. Perfect. Just what Jane had in mind, I have no doubts at all.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Mansfield Park

Next on our Jane Austen special, we'll be talking about Mansfield Park, one of the less well known books. Our heroine is a poor, plain girl named Fanny Price, who is sent to her rich aunt and uncle, the Bertrams, because her family has too many kids and not enough money to feed them all. Fanny becomes a sort of servant, but recieves no wages, merely a room and meals. She is treated with some form of civility by most of the family, but her cousin Edmund becomes a true friend and, as so many young girls do, she fell in love with him as they grew up. [Marrying cousins was ok then, don't worry]. But like so many men, Edmund is entirely blind to her feelings. He loves her as his best friend, but that's where it ends. When some new neighbors come a-calling, interesting things begin to happen. Miss Crawford catches Edmund's eye, and who does he confess his growing admiration and affection to? Why, his best friend Fanny, who else? Poor girl has to suffer through that, plus seeing what Mr. Crawford is doing to Edmund's sisters, one of whom is engaged to be married, though you couldn't tell from her behavior. Then she gets married, and Mr. Crawford turns his attentions to Fanny! Poor child, she's the only one who has any sense in the whole family. Everybody encourages her to accept him, but she knows what he is really like, and...ugh! I won't tell you what happens there, but a lot of family catastrophes go on and people begin to realize what we already knew: that Fanny is the only one with any sort of sense or brains, and they can rely on her to keep things calm and settled. She's treated better FINALLY. The end.

Oh, of COURSE that's not all, but you didn't really think I'd tell you details did you? Get up and get the book for yourself! It's fantastic!

The original movie version from the 80s. Quite good, but VERY 80s.

A more recent version, which might be my favorite. Isn't Fanny cute?



An even mroe recent version from the BBC. I like it, but Edmund isn't as cool as I wished.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Ode to Jane

My dear friend Andrea gave me a shout out in her blog a few days ago, for which I thank her, but she also happened to mention in her description of me, that I was a Jane Austen woman, though my blog did not talk about Jane Austen or her works. Just for that, Andrea, and for the rest of you who are still reading my blog, I vow to post a series of blogs on Jane Austen and her works. Tonight we start with the woman herself.
I'm not going to do a full on biography, though. If you are that interested, look at Wikipedia.
Jane Austen wrote six major novels: Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, Emma, Mansfield Park, Northanger Abbey, and Persuasion. There are a number of other works that she never finished, and probably even more that we'll never really know about. Her family was not wealthy and there were many children, which led to more trouble financially. Jane and her sister, the one and only, Cassandra were very close, which brings us to the next and most famous point about our fabulous writer: neither she nor Cassandra ever married. They were single their entire lives, owning the term "spinster" completely.
Now, you may ask, how can a woman who never married write such thrilling tales of the heart and become so famous for her romantic characters? Well, that is what the imagination is for! For her works are brilliant and capture human nature so well. They are entertaining and witty [and downright hilarious at times] and we all love them! She was an amazing and talented woman, and thank God she lived and did what she dreamed of!
A portrait of the woman herself.
Jane Austen as portrayed by Anne Hathaway in "Becoming Jane"

Jane Austen as portrayed by Olivia Williams in "Miss Austen Regrets"

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Realizations

I was reflective tonight. An odd thing, to be sure, but I tend to reflect a lot more now than I used to. I see things about myself and various things that I seem to have missed before. I'll share some with you.
1. I have a very hard time saying no. If someone asks me to do something, I'll usually do it. It doesn't take much to talk me into doing something unless I REALLY don't want to do it. But if I feel that someone actually does need me to do something, then 99.9% of the time, I will do it. People know this and sometimes they take advantage of it. It makes me feel used.
2. I am not very brave. If there is the slightest potential of embarrassment or any chance that I might not be good at whatever it is, I will not do it. I have a fear of embarrassment, of being laughed at, of having people talk about me when I am not there. It makes me a coward, I know, and I'm ashamed of it. I cannot get over that fear.
3. I don't let go very well. I worry, I over-think, I analyze, and I always find things that I could have done better or done differently or not at all. I hold on to memories because I am afraid there won't be others. I hold on to feelings because I don't know what will happen when they're gone.
4. I don't like being alone. It makes me think too much. It's depressing.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Happy December

Why does returning home from a vacation stink so much? Seriously, the day after vaca is automatically the worst day ever, unless it happens to be a birthday or a day off. But as it was neither for me, today was just plain icky. Not to mention that it tried to snow. Tried. No success. Plenty of frigid coldness and unless my workplace decides to actually heat the building and thereby free my poor fingers from their hypothermic coma, that will not change with the coming days. Plus I go back to school tomorrow, huzzah for boredom. I start clinic hours during my lunchbreak, which is bad as I very rarely let anything interfere with my lunch break, so I will probably not be in a good mood anyway, which makes for a bad massage. But hey! I'm not getting paid, so...
My bright spot: It is now Decemeber. Officially. It is now the month of my birthday and Christmas and Christmas vacation and Santa and Chicago Christmas and cinnamon rolls and presents and lights and carols and many many delicious levels of treats. When I am bored, mad, frustrated, grumpy, ticked, irritated, or just plain apathetic to anything else, I will remember that.
And this: "And there were in the same country, shepherds abiding in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks by night. And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about him. And they were sore afraid, and the angel said unto them, "Fear not. For behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a savior, which is Christ the Lord.' And suddenly there was with the angel, a multitude of heavenly hosts praising God and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth, peace, goodwill toward men." That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Thanksgiving surprise.

So my parents flew my sister Sarah home for Thanksgiving and didn't tell any of us that they were going to. I got home at 8:00 and they immediately rushed me up to my room, which confused me seriously, and BOOM. Sarah was sitting in my rocking chair and said, "I've ben waiting for you." Bags were hastily dropped and several minutes of squealing and hugging ensued. But the party didn't end there. Chris and Erin and Jenny had a longer drive up from Tennessee and they weren't going to be here until 11:00. So we plotted. We got a HUGE cardboard box and hid Sarah in it. If you go to this website [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jp_yp14u4Jc] you can see the reactions of them when the box was opened. It is hilarious.

Thanksgiving has been so much fun with all of us together. It has been at least 7 years since the entire family has been able to have Thanksgiving with each other. We've laughed so much and taken great pictures and it has been so much fun! Here are a few pics for your viewing pleasure.

Awww....picture in the backyard. Ain't we so cute?


We're also great big dorks. But I love us!



I love this picture most of all. Totally candid. My sisters rock.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

What a life.

I realized today that I am, in fact, completely dissatisfied with my life right now. I am working a job for the sake of the paycheck [which isn't as large as I need it to be] which funnels directly into a fund for my tuition at a school that feels like a drudgery [even though I KNOW it is worthwhile and useful] and because of that, there isn't money for me to buy my family the fabulous Christmas presents on the expensive side of the college-student spectrum [which is sort of my trademark] that I would wish to. I feel like every day is the same as the one before. Ok, so nothing is the same exactly one day after the other since I have school on Tuesdays and Thursdays and work every other day, with the occasional Saturday, and then it is Sunday, but you know what I mean. My days have no excitement, nothing to look forward to except the end of what I am doing and my food breaks. And my beloved laptop Penelope is getting fixed and I have been without her for a week, so I can't even chat with my friends or hammer away at my novels that HAVE to get done because I just entered one into a NATIONAL contest and have TONS of work to do and the OTHER is undergoing MAJOR reconstruction and I don't have the time or tools to do either of them!!!!
But I was just reading part of President Monson's talk about finding joy in the journey, and I am going to try really hard to do that. So here are my four points of joy for today and I am going to do this for every bad day I have.
1. I saw a show with my parents on Friday, which we all loved, and it was a musical.
2. I am not studying for my ATC boards any more. Blessed day, indeed.
3. We're putting up Christmas stuff at the Rahlf house because we don't have time to do it after Thanksgiving. It's so festive, I just can't NOT smile.
4. Thanksgiving is next week and I get to have it at home for the first time in 4 YEARS! AND Chris and Erin and Jenny will be there. We'll miss you, Sarah!

So that's it then. Oh, and my birthday is coming [December 8]. HOORAY!!! Send money instead of presents...I need it more. =)

Monday, November 3, 2008

Happy November!

You know, I really like November. It's not quite as pretty as October, but it is still quite lovely. The air gets cooler, the trees grow more colorful (until they get bare), and the colors of the season become rich and earthy. And then November melds into December, which is naturally the best month in the entire year. So November is like December Eve. And everyone knows that the anticipation of the Eve makes the Day itself so much better.
Besides, we have Thanksgiving in November, which is the best thing ever. Lots of food and no guilt? YES PLEASE!
But anyway, I am stressed to the max right now. My AT exam is on Saturday and I have studied my hardest and given up any and all free time (erm....except for these five minutes) and done nothing but eat, sleep, and study. No really, even at work and school I am studying for this thing. It's awful! I'm not as nervous as I used to be, but the stress and anticipation are definately reaching dangerous heights. But if---WHEN--I pass it this time, this will be the best November ever, and I will probably be on a high for the entire month.
BUT as if the stress levels from THAT weren't enough, I discovered that Josh Groban is releasing a collection CD.....IN EUROPE! Oh, sure the States will get it EVENTUALLY, but GEEZ! HE'S AN AMERICAN!


Ladies, please! Is this not the most beautiful album cover ever? I have never seen him look so attractive and the fact that I have to wait for all of those European women to be satiated first....Ugh, it is too much to be bourne. It is NOT to be bourne. I need to do something about it.... after the test.

Oh, my friends, pray for me. I will need strength for this week and the added abilities of the Lord on Saturday. Whatever happens is His will, I know this....but it would be really nice if our wills were in sync this time....

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Bill of Rights

My darling friend Cecily, whom I met first during BYU Sports and Dance Camps and then was fortunate enough to be in company with my entire time in England posted this amazing thing on her blog called the Single Good Girl's (and Guy's) Bill of Rights. I was so impressed with it that I had to post a second time on here today. I hope you don't mind, Cec, as I did say it was you who engineered this awesomeness. But seriously, single people (and you married people too) take notes!!
A Single Good Girl's (and Guy's) Bill of Rights:
1) If you are a good person, you deserve a GOOD person. If the man/woman you are interested treats you badly, they are NOT good enough for you. Do not waste time with a person that does not treat you the way a son or daughter of God should be treated. Do not put up with belittling, maliciousness, manipulation, or guilt from the person you are dating. This is wrong.
2) In relation to #1, remember that there are many, many good men/women out there who will treat you much better. Have faith in the Lord and Move On. Trust that the Lord will bless you with a good, righteous relationship.
3) Communication is a must. You must be able to communicate problems and differences and be willing to sort them out afterwards. Every good young man/woman deserves effective communication in any kind of relationship. Do not immaturely give the cold shoulder and think "He knows why I'm mad, he should say sorry to me at once". He probably doesn't know what you're mad about, he's a Man!
4) Girls, every good man deserves a good woman. Just because it is "that time of the month" does not give you the excuse that you can treat everyone in your life like dirt (family and friends alike). Be a good person all of the time. It's okay to be emotional, but realize before you get angry why you're getting angry. And guys, don't put up with emotional girls. If they treat you like dirt 1 week out of every month, that will be a very very very long relationship, and marriage. Date girls that have a grip on themselves and can practice self-control (a very good quality to have in a marriage). And worse, my own personal pet peeve, girls just shouldn't date estrogen-filled guys. That should be biologically impossible . . .
5) Sorry, I got on a rant. #5 is that every good guy and girl deserve a selfless partner. This is the #1 reason that couples today get a divorce--selfishness. Work on being a selfless person, sacrificing your desires for the good of others, and you will in turn attract selfless people. If you work on being selfless in finances, communication, and relationships with family and friends, you will have a wonderful life and hopefully find the spouse of your dreams.
6) We each deserve someone willing to work. A good man that is willing to work and be productive will make a great marriage partner. A good girl is not going to be spending hours and hours everyday watching TV, looking at Facebook, or writing blogs, but is going to spend her time doing homework and cultivating herself. We need to be wary that we don't let idleness seap into our lives.
7) A potential spouse will encompass all of the qualities listed above because he loves the Lord. He will want to be a good boyfriend, fiance, husband and father because he loves the Lord and loves you. A good wife will put the Lord first in her life above all else, and will put her marriage to you second on the list. A good relationship will not work if Heavenly Father is not included in the triangle.

I think there was more, but that was all we get for now!! Fantastic, isn't it???

Hi

I'm alive, I am well, and most of the time, I am exhausted. My job is great, but long days. My school is the same, but long days. I finished the first edit of my second book to get it out of the way so that I can use all of my brain power for....THE EXAM.
Yes, you read that right. THE exam. The one I have failed twice. I am defying sanity and taking it for a third time. I will need all of your prayers, good wishes, birthday wishes, wishing well wishes, eyelash wishes, and 11:11 wishes to help me pass!
Ooops, time to go study again!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Ouch....

I hope that you all haven't been feeling neglected by my lack of updates. I've been so insanely busy that I don't even know what day it is. I started my new job at Michaels on Wednesday, so I've been working 6 hour shifts and getting training and filling out paper work, etc. I had school on Thursday, then worked again on Friday, and then Friday night I went up to Waynesville, Ohio to help my good pal Lorrie Monn with her booth for the Sauerkraut Festival. It's this really cute craft fair, which, of course, includes tons of sauerkraut [smells awful], but there's a lot of other foods and fun stuff. Lorrie's business, Mistletoe Memories, makes Christmas ornaments that we then personalize to the customer's specificaitions. It was tons of fun, but I worked 12 hours on Saturday, on my feet the entire time, and then 11 hours on Sunday. THEN I went in to work today (didn't have to go in until 3, so I at least got to sleep in) and was on my feet for another 6 hours. Currently, my feet are propped up on the desk and I can feel them throb. It is times like these, as I told my new friend Alex [she worked with us at the Festival] when a husband would come in handy. Footrubs, shoulder rubs, comments about how amazing and hardworking I am, etc, etc, etc. I could use any or all of that at this time, but I'll settle for now with the reminder that I made a ton of money in one long, exhausting weekend.
I have to go to bed now, because I have a full day of school tomorrow! My goodness, I think I AM amazing...

Sunday, October 5, 2008

My Heart Is Overflowing

There is nothing else I can think of but that to describe the feelings that encompass me at this very moment. I cannot restrain the tears that are running down my face and I am not sure that I want to. I feel as though my heart could very well fly out of my chest and into the sky, though what it would do there, I have no idea. Today has been a day of miracles for me, though I have not seen anything out of the ordinary nor done anything that would merit that high standard. But God is merciful and marvelous, and I cannot help but share with you the feelings that are bursting from my soul.
These past few months have been the most trying of my life. I would venture to say that the loss of my brother when I was twelve could not compare with the pains I have felt. I knew that Andrew was with Timmy and that God would protect them and keep them, and that they had a work to do beyond my mortal scope. I knew it. It did not lessen the pain, but it softened the mourning and relieved the despair. A few months after this, I moved away from the only home I could remember to a brand new place, one that was unfamiliar and, at my age, unfriendly. For the first time, I was uncertain of myself and what would happen to me. It was rough and I suffered much, but trust in the Lord and in my family got me through.
But since graduating college, things have been different. I have been completely on my own and even more uncertain of myself than ever before. I trusted in the Lord but I felt that He did not trust in me. This was a dangerous feeling to have and I knew it. But such is my emotional nature that I felt it anyway. I was in my own personal Gethsemane, unable to have the help of the Lord and unable to change a thing. I knew He had his reasons for sending me through the trials that He had, but I could not see any light to guide my way. I had failed my boards twice, the test that would prove my college experience worthwhile, which led me to the belief that I had made the wrong decisions with regards to my education. I felt that I must be out of tune with my spirit, that whatever the Lord had been trying to tell me I had not heard because I had made myself deaf, and now He had stopped speaking to me. I was left in a place that used to be a home, wondering if I was in the right place, wondering if I had blindly pushed forward into something that was wrong for me. I didn't know where to go, what to do, or in whom to confide. How could I confess to anyone that I was feeling weak and abandoned? I have always been strong, and this collapse was mortifying. All I knew was that I had to keep going because there was no other way to go and if I wanted the Lord to speak to me again, I had to play the game His way. It IS His game, after all.
Well, after the amazing Women's Conference last weekend, a conversation with a man so close to the Lord that he knew I needed something special, and a therapeutic home visit and blessing from my father, things began to look up. I was happier, I was more optimisitic, and I began to feel again. And then I turned in a random application, immediately had an interview, and two days later I recieved a part time job that met all of my set requirements. And today at General Conference, I recieved a deep and abiding testimony that Thomas S. Monson is God's prophet, that he recieves revelation for us directly from the Lord, and that he is the man to lead this church. Then tonight I watched "Emma Smith: My Story" and I heard a line that I don't know if the real Emma actually said, but I like it anyway. "Strength is not something we are born with. Strength is something that we find." And suddenly I realized that I could do whatever the Lord expected of me. If Emma could make it through so much, then I could at least battle through the murky waters that had begun to swirl around me. As soon as I came to that decision, I felt a wash of something so strong that tears poured out of my eyes like a river, and since I am a messy crier, the nose started to run also, and as I am just getting over a cold, it was not a pretty sight. But it didn't matter. I knew in my heart that whatever the Lord had in store for me, this experience would shape me for it. I was reminded from the movie of the scripture in D&C from Liberty jail: " My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high. ...Know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." I knew that was my answer, too. So, after the movie was finished, and I cleaned myself up, I came downstairs to my room, determined to write a blog about this. But something told me to check my brother and sister-in-law's blog first. Erin, I love you even more for what you said on Friday. She quoted Elder Jeffrey R. Holland and as soon as I read it, I burst into my frantic, messy tears again. It was the rest of my answer. "First of all, I want you to be proud you are a woman. I want you to feel the reality of what that means, to know who you truly are. You are literally a spirit daughter of heavenly parents with a divine nature and an eternal destiny. That surpassing truth should be fixed deep in your soul and be fundamental to every decision you make as you grow into mature womanhood. There could never be a greater authentication of your dignity, your worth, your privileges, and your promise. Your Father in Heaven knows your name and knows your circumstance. He hears your prayers. He knows your hopes and dreams, including your fears and frustrations. And He knows what you can become through faith in Him."
I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and believes in me. I know that He knows me, knows what I want and need, and what I can handle. That is what He was trying to tell me: that I have within me strength I didn't know about. Somehow, I had found the strength to come through without losing my faith or myself. And beyond that, I can see more clearly my path laid out before me. I have no idea where it will lead, but the path is His trail for me, and if I stay on it, nothing can prevent me from attaining what He has in store for me.
And that will give me the strength I need to continue on.

Monday, September 29, 2008

New Happiness

Ok, besides the fact that the Relief Society broadcast was AMAZING and that my home stake's Women's Conference was OUTSTANDING, I have other happy things that may have just completed my life.
1) My mom, bless her, took me shopping while I was home because I am a very poor no-longer-college student, and she bought me not only a new skirt [which is adorable] but a new pair of Church shoes that just might be the most favorite shoes that I now own.
Aren't they fantastic??? Seriously. I wore them to church yesterday and I felt amazing.

2) I saw a new musical on Friday. It's a musical adaptation of Emma. I was skeptical at first, because we all know that it is one thing to make a movie from a book, but an entirely different thing to make a musical out of one. It works sometimes [like Les Miserables] and sometimes it doesn't [like Gone With The Wind]. This one was totally amazing. I think it must be off-Broadway, but it was the most fantastic thing I have seen since London. Mr. Knightly was a god, Emma was perfect, Harriet Smith was both as endearing and annoying as she should be, and the music was fun and sooooo good. There's a song Knightly sings about Emma and ugh! It totally made me cry.They were so cute! And I laughed my face off. Thankfully, the girl sitting next to me from our group was single, too, so we laughed at the same things... After Knightley finished his BEAUTIFUL song [part of which can be viewed on youtube here:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aw2LdVR1GC4 ], she leaned over to me a whispered, "I want one of those." I was in total agreement

So yes, new happiness has been found. Besides that, I inherited a full package of Halloween Oreos. Perfection...for the time being...

Monday, September 22, 2008

Begging Time...

I am going to completely abandon every sense of pride I ever posessed and get down on my knees [figuratively, of course. I couldn't type here if I actually were kneeling] and BEG, PLEAD, and CAJOLE any of you with any connections into the world of publishing to give me a boost up into it. I've sent out at least 15 letters, still awaiting the response from three, and all have been rejections. This is ok, it happens to all authors. But I've just finished my SECOND novel, and my fingers are itching to get going on the third, and I don't even have any prospects for my FIRST! Granted, it is certainly possible for me to keep writing and then just pass this stuff out, but, call me greedy, I want to make a little bit of proft. And I want to avoid that copyrighting issue. What's to stop any of you sneaky twits from selling this as your own? I don't care about being a bestseller, I just want to share what I've got with people!
So please, friends, if you know anyone in the adult fiction publishing area, or knows someone who knows someone, or your dentist's neice's husband's brother's podiatrist's former in-laws work at a publishing house, let me know. If you need proof that I'm not just chasing a wild fantasy, I'll send you some stuff. It's gone over pretty well with everyone who has read it thusfar, and I'm very proud of it.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. Thanks so much, and I promise to never shame myself this way again.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Confessions

13 Confessions from Me:
1. I will not do anything that has a potential to embarrass me. This includes sports and games. Oddly enough, I will do almost anything in a skit...
2. I hate video games and think they are a HUGE waste of time
3. I don't like basketball. Hate it, actually.
4. I don't like Jim Carrey. I think he is a good actor, especially when he does serious stuff, but I don't think he is that funny.
5. I think birds are the creepiest, scariest things on the planet. I hate hate hate HATE them.
6. I can call up a movie quote almost immediately but it takes time for anything school related to formulate.
7. I hate blatantly stupid movies and shows. Napoleon Dynamite, Nacho Libre, The Office, etc. I don't ever care to see Dumb and Dumber for that reason.
8. I HATE bad grammar and wrong pronunciation
9. Slow drivers and walkers tick me off like nothing else
10. I have a crazy obsession with love. It's incureable. I read it, I listen to songs about it, I write stories about it, I watch movies about it.
11. I sing in the car when I'm by myself. Loudly.
12. I cry in movies and during songs and while watching Hallmark commercials.
13. I cannot watch films where a spouse dies without going entirely to pieces. Total meltdown.

I tag Erin, Alicia, Jane, and Steph. And anyone else who wants to...

Friday, September 19, 2008

Update

Well, I suppose I ought to let people know what is happening with me right now. Sadly, my life is not very exciting and I have little hope of it improving. I had two job interviews this week, one as a sales associate for Massage Envy, which would be good, but it doesn't sound like something I would enjoy. The other was for a position on the Inventory Team or as a Seller at Borders, which would be SPECTACULAR. Both went well, but Borders sounds like more fun to me! Let's see, what else.... OH! There was a HUGE power outage all across the lower half of the state of Ohio because of a wind storm sent up from Ike. 1 million homes without power! For days! We were only out for 36 hours here, but the phones and internet were out for an additional 24. Thank heavens for cell phones! We didn't suffer any damages here, but many did.
In other news, I finished the first draft of my second novel, "The Heart of a Scoundrel", which is hilarious and a rousing good time. Now I am editing (endlessly) and still trying to get the first novel, "From Afar", published, which is taking forever, as no literary agent has accepted it yet. But never fear, I shall prevail.
Oh yeah, and I still have school. Yick.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Chocolate


I love chocolate. I do. I make sure that I always have some nearby because I never know when I'll need a fix. Chocolate is a pick-me-up, it is my happy thought, and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, rather like I'd imagine that love would. I'm not addicted, but I highly doubt that I could give it up entirely if I needed to. I pray every so often that it won't make the list of the Word of Wisdom forbidden food because if it did, I would cry for years. I'm afraid the Lord might do it anyway just so I have to suffer it. It would probably be really funny for Him to watch.

But does anybody notice that our chocolate changes with the seasons? Autumn is coming, and so I crave caramel and chocolate, like a Carmello. In winter, it's chocolate and mint. Spring...well, that's when the fruit candy is real big, but those of us who are purists get the Spring colored M&Ms of our choice. And summer is all about the chocolate and nuts. Why do we associate those flavors with those times of the year?

What do you think? What is your favorite seasonal chocolate treat?

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Castles in the Sky

Yesterday I met a woman who had everything I had ever wanted in life. She had a husband who was not only attractive (no, I was not checking him out, but a girl does notice these things) but thoughtful and playful. She had a few kids, all of whom were well behaved and beautiful, to boot. And she was so cute and fun and really just a great mom. I got to hold her 4 and a half month old baby girl for a very long time, and she had the most amazing blue eyes I have ever seen and the most perfect lips. She was an absolutely beautiful baby and she smelled just like a perfect baby ought to. As I was holding her, the thought occured to me that had my life turned out differently, this could have been my life. I could have been the woman standing at the poolside chatting with friends holding her baby girl in her arms. Granted, I most likely would only have had the one, but still, holding that little girl in my arms, I could see it. I could see myself with the husband playing around with other kids in the pool while I held our beautiful baby girl in the shade, watching him with all the love in the world, shaking my head at his childish antics, wondering if I had married a boy or a man. I actually got teared up during all of this, wishing that it had been the way my life had gone. That little baby symoblized all I had ever wanted in life.
But my life isn't that way, and, though it pains me very much to admit it, that was not how it was supposed to be. My life is turning out just the way it is supposed to go, however that is. I may not like it now or understand it at this point, but the Lord works in mysterious ways, and it is not up to me to determine if it is right or wrong because He is in control. He knows what I want and what is best for me, and all I gotta say is He's never let me down before, so there must be a DANG good life waiting in the wings for me. I just gotta get there and not lose faith. I firmly believe that I will get all that I have been dreaming off since I was a little girl, complete with the handsome Prince Charming to sweep me off of my feet and dream of castles in the sky with me, and live happily ever after. I know that happily ever after is not something that just happens, but must be worked towards, and I am going to enjoy the adventure of the work.
But until then, I'll still remember with a bit of sadness what I saw yesterday of what I could have. I'll still get it, but that doesn't really stop me from wishing it could be sooner rather than later.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Giving

We had stake conference this weekend, and Elder Tiexiera [I THINK I spelled that right...] of the Seventy came to visit. He's from Frankfurt Germany but he seems to have lived just about everywhere. He told us this story about a man who lived with his family in Rwanda in the 70s. They were very wealthy and had a lot of possessions, but were very good people. One of the things that they had that was very important to them was a Mercedes Benz that they had picked out directly from the factory and they loved it very much. Anyway, a war started in Rwanda, and they needed to get out of the country. The fourteen year old daughter left fist, because the whole family could not travel together. They sent her to Portugal where they had a lot of family. The two sons left next, and then the wife. The man remained in Rwanda for a time to help the customers of his bank, to make sure that they would be taken care of. He had nearly everything taken from him. His massive collection of books was confiscated by the government. His money was absorbed into other funds. His house was foreclosed. He had nothing but money enough to leave and his Mercedes Benz. He met a friend of his on the road one day and asked how he was doing. The friend broke down into tears and told him how his mother was very ill and needed to go to hospital, but he couldn't get to her because he had no car, and they would never be able to leave the country on foot. This man reached into his pocket and pulled out his car keys and handed them to his friend. "If there is any car that can get through the borders, it's this one. Take it." His friend thanked him profusely and left. The only thing this man still had and he GAVE it away. Years later, after he'd been reunited with his family and they had been living in Portugal for some time, he was walking along a port with his wife and on a ship docked there, they saw a car that resembled the one that they used to have. They went over to the captain, who told them they'd had the car for months just waiting for someone to claim it, but no one had. All they had was a note with a single name on it. It just so happened that it was this man's name, and it was this man's car. He opened the note and it read: "Dear [his name], This car saved my mother's life. I return it to you with a heart full of gratitude. Signed [his friend]." The only thing that he GAVE away was returned to him.
Elder Teixiera's message was this: what we give, we always recieve. And we recieve more than we ever give.
It was an amazing conference.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

My name...

So I wonder a lot what people's names mean. Why are you named what you are?
As far as I know, my parents just liked my name. It was going to be Chris's name if he was a girl, and then it was going to be Timmy's name if he was a girl, but alas...
So there's no REASON for me to have my name. But through the help of babynames.com, I discovered some meanings.
Rebecca is a Hebrew name [like we didn't know that] and it means Snare. Intruiging and yet so ironic....
Lynne is English and it means From The Lake. Oooooooo....
And NOT thanks to babynames.com, I know the meaning of my last name. Connolly is Irish and it means courageous or valorous.
So. Snare From The Lake Courageous. Sounds like an Indian name. Hey, I like it! Which is a good thing, as it is a mite late to change it.
Now the REAL question is will my new last name when I eventually get married have just as cool of a meaning as my current one? What if it means Hairy Dog? That would totally ruin the effect of the sweetness of my name. What if it has more consonants than a mouth can handle and I have to spell it out every single day of my life 27 times? Last names are very important! Whenever I meet a semi-attractive guy, I tack his last name onto mine and see if it works. If it doesn't, he's out. Ok, maybe not TOTALLY out, but it is a definate strike. Imagine if my name became Becky Boomer. I mean, I would have to wear a paper bag on my head in public. If I have to subject myself to eternal humiliation based on my name alone, my husband had better be the most attractive man on the planet. Seriously...
I'm going to start praying for a good last name...or the most attractive man on the planet...
I'd prefer both.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Growing Up

I've come to the realization that no matter how hard I try to deny it, I have become one of the things that I used to want to be but now fear.
I have become.... an ADULT!! [cue really creepy dramatic music and screaming female]
Yes, shocking though it is, I can no longer deny it.
Let us face facts:
1) I have completed high school. Granted, this is not technically a sign of maturation, but it is a mark of progression.
2) I have graduated from college. A rather momentous occasion, and most people start their lives at this point.
3) I no longer live at home. Debatable mark of adulthood, as some people still live at home due to circumstances beyond their control.
4) I am over the age of 21. The most promising mark other than college graduation, as according to all legal matters except that of car rental, I am considered an adult. This also means that I can legally drink...whoopee.
5) I have travelled abroad on my own. Not quite a mark of adulthood, but certainly a mark of refinement.
So, according to the facts, I can establish that I am such. Unfortunately, my brain is not quite so convinced of my new status. Why just today I got into a slap war with Dallin [the high school freshman whose basement I live in] and I think I won. I still grumble in the early morning hours, I still sneak candy whenever I can, I whisper loudly in the movie theater, and I don't sit still in church. Am I a hopeless cause, or just a late bloomer?
And for your enjoyment, I'm now going to compare my younger years with my more mature [PHST!] years. Enjoy the pictures, and draw your own conclusions.




Notice the size of the mouth. Hasn't changed with respect to the rest of the face. At least I'm not drooling on Sarah.




I think there's a reason why this first picture was taken before we made anything, i.e., Becky 16 years later without the Tupperware mat.




So I still like dressing up. I'm a stylin' person, people! Only difference is the first one was for church, and the second one was for the Oscar's party we had...

Ah, yes...costumes. The first one is obviously Halloween. And the second...15 years later...is not.
So, as you can see, I haven't changed much. Whether or not that is a good thing is still up for debate. I may be an adult in the most technical sense, but that doesn't mean that I have to like it! And heaven forbid I ever become MATURE! Yelch!
And as a side note, none of these older pictures were taken with the younger ones in mind. I was just lucky enough to find these on my computer in the last 20 minutes.
So, AM I a grown up? Do tell.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

From Afar...my novel

Prologue

If there is one thing to which young girls can—and do—aspire, it is being in love. They know it is rare to experience such a state, but are determined that they shall be one of the select few to turn out victorious.
Rebecca Dumate never thought about such things. That is, until he entered her life, and then she could think of nothing else. The paragon of perfection and his family moved into the elegant Benbridge estate, just three miles from her own home at Marshall Hall, when she was eleven. Over those three miles lay a lake as smooth as glass followed by rolling hills of lush green grass that led right up to her back door.
It was while she was standing on one of those hills that she caught her first glimpse of her new neighbors. Rebecca had just won yet another race against her three brothers and best friend Isabella Buchanan when she caught sight of the wagons and carts full of servants and luggage. All of the children ran into the house and informed anyone within a hearing distance (and a few that weren't) of the new arrivals. Mr. Dumate had left the very next morning to greet them, and returned with the delightful news that a Lord and Lady Birkham, their two sons, and a cousin Mr. Winters were now taking up residence.
Her brothers had been understandably excited as they had no playmates other than each other, and her elder sister Mary had blushed at her father’s suggestion that she become introduced to the cousin, who was apparently very handsome and in possession of an equally handsome fortune. Mr. Dumate further surprised them all with the information that the family would be dining with them the following evening at Marshall Hall.
The dinner proved to be a most advantageous event for both families. Mr. and Mrs. Dumate found Lord and Lady Birkham to be as pleasant and amiable as Mr. Dumate’s first impression had indicated. They were very well dressed; Lady Birkham had the air of fashion and rank, though with none of the pride and superiority that plagued many of her station. She was exquisitely beautiful, ageless and elegant, and delightfully witty. Lord Birkham was a more somber man, content to let his wife carry the conversations. He, too, had a ready smile, and it was evident that he adored his wife, and that his sons had a great respect and admiration for him.
The sons, Andrew and William, ages fifteen and thirteen, respectively, were very well-mannered boys, energetic and loud, but very respectful. Andrew’s manner was that of a playful nature, and his brother was just as lighthearted who delighted in following Andrew wherever he led. As luck would have it, the Birkham boys became fast friends with Edward and Henry, the younger two of Rebecca’s brothers, who were precisely the same ages.
The most pleasant introduction of the evening was, without a doubt, that of Mr. Winters to Miss Dumate. He was very handsome, and gave as much attention that a single young woman, and her overly anxious parents, could ever hope to receive. Mary, ever the lady, received his compliments with all politeness but could not escape the slight blush on her cheeks. During the course of the meal, little was said between them, but it was not unusual to catch one of them stealing a glance at the other.
Poor Rebecca, being the youngest of the party, found the whole of the meal somewhat dull with no one left to talk to. She did enjoy watching Mary who was behaving very strangely with all her stares and blushes and strove to hide her giggles in her napkin. This won her a look of disapproval from Frederick, her eldest brother, who knew precisely what she was witnessing. Afraid of being rude and of his scolding her, Rebecca immediately plastered a solemn look on her face until she saw Fred cast a wink and a small smile. She returned his smile, and continued her scan of the room.
Her eyes rested upon young Andrew Birkham, who was chatting animatedly with her brothers. She noticed his crooked grin, very straight teeth, and the way his hand was running absentmindedly over his dark curls. He was very different from her brothers, she thought. He was handsome and charming like the prince of her beloved fairy tales. He was a pure example of a gentleman, in her estimation. He would never tie her braids to her own bedpost and then run away laughing. Her scalp still ached from her brothers’ prank last week. No, he was perfect in every way, and she could only imagine how her heart would flutter when he flashed that crooked grin at her. She heard herself sigh, and, shocked by the sound, began to cover it up with a few coughs.
Edward looked at her strangely, his eyes questioning her, but she merely pointed to her throat and smiled. He laughed, and that, thankfully, was the end of it. She breathed a sigh of relief, inwardly this time, and focused once more on her food.
When the meal was completed, they were all to go to the drawing room for further conversation and the looming possibility of a musical recital. The children dreaded the long evening of sitting still and talking about dull subjects until Edward and Henry approached their father with a proposition. The boys asked if they--meaning the two Birkham’s, themselves, and Rebecca--could bring blankets outside so they might all gaze at the stars and find constellations. Mr. Dumate consented and called for Thomas to take the children outside.
Rebecca noticed that Frederick shot them a longing glance as they began to leave, knowing full well that at seventeen he was no longer considered a child, and therefore could not escape the adults. She smiled sympathetically at him, but only received a scowl in return. Making sure no one was looking, she stuck her tongue out and ran to catch up with the boys.
They all went to the large hill behind the house, set down their blankets, and laid upon them; Thomas standing nearby awaiting any order or request. Rebecca settled herself at the end of the line of blankets quickly and immediately began examining the clear night sky. The boys were talking amongst themselves about this star or that planet, leaving her to be silent and thoughtful.
“And what thoughts occupy your mind so completely, Miss Rebecca?”
She started as she realized that the person lying beside her was Andrew Birkham. Suddenly she felt slightly ill but realized that he was expecting an answer and so responded.
“I was trying to pick a star to wish upon,” she told him, half embarrassed and half breathless from having his presence only inches away.
Edward chortled, and Henry snickered quietly. “Don’t be such a girl, Rebecca.” Seeing the slightly hurt look on her face, he repented. “Come on, old chum. Help me find Cassiopeia before Henry does.”
Rebecca smiled in forgiveness and started searching for the constellation. After winning that race, they started again with other constellations until they had exhausted their memory of them. They started indoors again, but before going in, Andrew pulled Rebecca aside.
“Pick out your star, miss.”
She smiled, turned back, and found one, a bright blue in the southern sky. She pointed at it. “That one there.”
He leaned down close to see where she pointed and nodded thoughtfully. “Excellent choice,” he whispered in her ear. “Now, you must wish upon it whenever you can, and you must never tell the wish, otherwise it will not come true.”
Unable to summon her powers of speech, she nodded obediently. Henry called for them both, telling them to hurry. Andrew grinned and ran inside.
Rebecca was completely smitten from that moment on, and was absolutely certain that Andrew Birkham was perfect, her own prince charming. And she vowed there and then, upon that star, that somehow, she was going to win the race for his heart. And Rebecca Dumate never lost a race.

Starting Over.

I have not been very happy as of late. I've just moved to Cincinnati, and although I lived here in my childhood, it hardly resembles the same place. There are some familiar faces and places and things, but for the most part, it is changed. I have yet to meet any kids from the single's branch here, and so my social circle is limited to the Rahlf's [whom I love to death, mind you...] and the people in my Massage Therapy classes [I'm saving THAT rant for tomorrow...look for it.] So right now, this place is very very lonely for me. It's depressing, actually. I'm praying and reading my scriptures and such, so THAT part of me is ok, but sometimes the Spirit just isn't enough, you know?
It reminds me of a story I heard: There was this little boy who sometimes had problems in the night where he would wake up and cry because he was scared. His mother would come in and would tell him to pray and that Heavenly Father and the Spirit would make him feel better, and that he didn't need to call for her all the time. A few nights later, he called for her in the night again, and she came in and told him the same thing she had before. Her little boy looked up at her, with tears swimming in his big eyes, and said, "Mommy, don't you know? Sometimes you just need someone with skin on."
That's how I feel most of the time! The more I learn about touch in class, the more I wish that I had more exposure to it. That sounds weird, let me try to explain: I am the type of person that loves hugs. I will randomly go up to my mom or a friend and wrap my arms around them purely for the reason that I need that contact. I enjoy being close to people physically, and sometimes I just feel like I have to touch. It makes things more real to me, and I feel more comfortable when I can establish that I have access to it. But right now, I am starving for affectionate human contact. Granted, I get the impersonal professional touch of the students in massage class [which should be comforting, but it's not...again, watch for tomorrow's blog], but it's not the same.
ANYWAY, barring the lack of human contact, I felt that something was missing. So I started going through my writing again, and BOOM I had something to fill my endless hours. I thought I'd start to share some things with you on here. Not all of it, because then when I'm famous, no one would buy the book. And I don't want y'all to save this stuff and publish it under a new name! JERKS! Haha, jk. But I hope you'll bear with me as I begin to open up with my writing, which happens to express more of me than I ever thought it would. Advice on the writing [or anything else, for that matter] is welcome! I'll post it above this. Enjoy!

Monday, August 11, 2008

A Deeper Glimpse...A Darker Glimpse

This post has been deleted by the blogger, as it was a vain attempt to vent some very personal things and resulted in misunderstandings and concern rather than being seen for what it was meant to be. Sorry.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Oh the stories I have to tell...

No, I didn't die. No, I was not abducted by aliens. And no, I did not win 5 million dollars, move to a deserted island with a very attractive very single doctor, and completely enjoy forgetting about every single one of you. Fabulous, though that last sounds.
I have been INSANELY busy.
Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up: I have been packing for my move to Cincy, shopping for a fabulous outfit that I can wear this weekend to the wedding of some high school friends [ladies, you understand the pressure THAT puts on a girl...] and then Breaking Dawn came out. Oh, Breaking Dawn, how did I ever live without you? Anyway, I stayed up all night and read the entire thing [I read fast] and then I went to sleep about 7:45 Saturday morning. Here's where it gets fuzzy. so I'll speak in third person. Apparently, Becky got up about 11 and decided to go and take a shower. However, unbeknownst to  her, during her brief hours of sleep, her body pillow with the thick velvety case fell off of the bed and landed atop the only AC vent in her room. Now, for those of you who have not memorized everything about Becky's life, her room faces directly east and she has 2 windows. Therefore, it gets VERY warm in her room in the mornings. Thus, the thick body pillow with the velvety covering landing on the only source of cool air for the entire room rendered things a bit complicated. So, Becky, as she always does, sprang out of bed without a second thought and certainly no recovery for her head, and darted to the bathroom to cleanse herself. Upon reaching the bathroom, the heat of the room and the staying up all night caught up with her. She passed out and on her way to the floor, hit her head on either the toilet paper holder or the toilet itself, we aren't entirely sure, as no one saw her do it.
Now, her brave sister Jenny, hero of the day, was downstairs and heard the thump and, upon receiving no satisfactory audible response from Becky, ascended to the bathroom to ascertain the situation. She found Becky sitting up, feet propped against the door, making no sense. Thinking quickly and taking in Becky's pale and VERY sweaty state, she helped her undress and get into the bathtub, where she began to cool her off with cold water. Their mother arrived soon after and, upon hearing Becky repeat herself many MANY times, decided that a trip to the ER would be advisable.
After many hours, a catheter, a CT scan, blood tests, and waiting, the trusty staff of the Home Hospital in Lafayette decided that Becky had a concussion and needed to stay overnight for further observation. They moved her up into a room, and this is where Becky's memory began to kick in, and she no longer needed to repeat the same questions over and over and over and over and...well, you get the idea.
So. That was that. It was very frustrating for me, and very exasperating. But I went home on Sunday, and Mom helped me to finish packing [ok, she did it all and I sat in a chair and told her yes or no]. I drove to Cincy on Monday, with about 50 trillion guardian angels, I'm sure, and I went to my first day of school yesterday. Hoo, BUDDY, are there some characters in that class! It will be a very interesting time, lemme tell ya. 
Today I did very little. Job hunting and therapeutic book purchasing. [Don't mock me,  it works.] School again tomorrow, and then I plan on moving my things into a semi-permanent place and cleaning on Friday. But shhh! Don't tell Lori. She's out of town.
Which reminds me... Readers of this blog will please take a moment now to raise a cheer for the birth of Lorelei Brynn Rahlf. She came on August 5th at 4:30 MST (or is it MDT?) and weighed 8 lbs 9 oz. Happy parents are Tony and Melanie Rahlf, and excited big brother Soren. HUZZAH!
More updates to follow in the coming days, and more writing for those of you who are enlightened enough to receive it. Thank you and good night.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

I've been tagged.....

Thanks, Kerstin, for giving me something to do!
The rules are as follows for this chain letter:
1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Write six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
5. Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.
6. Let your tagger know when your blog entry is up.

Six random things:

I have a stronger attachment to my books than my clothes.

I eat my pancakes with peanut butter and syrup

I am the smallest member of my immediate family.

I've been writing stuff since I was in first grade...it's mostly rubbish, but STILL...

It has been stated that I have the ugliest feet in the Connolly family, and that includes grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

I'm a little obsessed with good smelling things. Body spray, lotion, candles, bath salts, aromatherapy sticks... (and that's just on my desk and dresser right now....)

And I am going to tag.......Erin, Celeste, Jane, Jackie, Alicia, and Kylie!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

To do....Or Not to do.....

So I woke up this morning at the semi-normal (because my windows face directly east....) hour of 7:45, laid in bed for another hour reading New Moon, and then sat up, looked around my room, and decided that I really didn't HAVE to get out of bed today. But then my newly installed adult portion of my brain said, "Yes, Becky, you do. You have a ton to do and you have to do it." Well, I fought with that stupid adult side for fifteen minutes, and then finally decided that I COULD get up without acutally doing anything.
Perhaps I should explain...currently, my room is littered with various articles of clothing, random bits of papers, and a general disaster thanks to my graduating, moving, travelling, and having to move again. Since I have NO idea how much space I actually have at my new place, the idea of beginning to pack again terrifies me. Not to mention that my parents have asked me to go through all of the stuff that USED to be in my closet and throw things out... Can we say ick? They have youth program service projects for things like that!
Anyway, the writing process is going EXTREMELY well, even though Jenny seems to think I'm anti-social. Whatever. I'm not going to stop, if that's what she means...love her, though. She's such a goof.
So who knows how much of whatever is going to get done today. I only have a week until Orientation, so I should do SOMETHING besides write today. Like take a shower. That I can do.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

This time I really am back, I promise.

Well, I hope none of you thought I was dead, though I wouldn't blame you if you did, seeing as how I haven't posted on here in AGES. But never fear, I am alive and well....mostly....
Ok, here comes the explanation. Last April, if you recall, I took the atheletic training certification exam. I found out on the day of my graduation ceremony AFTER I had graduated that I had failed. To make a very long story very short, I was devastated, and didn't want to duscuss it. But I went off to England, and had a marvelous time and only thought about the test every single day. But there was nothing I could do about it overseas, so I didn't worry about it. Just before I came home the scores of the test were sent out and I found out that I had failed by 6 points. Just 6. That's all. That took some getting over. Anyway, I came home, started unpacking, and then went to Omaha for Jenny, as you all know. And since then I have done nothing but study, eat, sleep, and occasionally take a shower. I have not been blogging or writing at all, and, trust me, I felt the pain of that! After months of nothing but writing, try telling yourself to stop. It sucks. ANYWHO, I just took the test again this morning, feel GREAT about it, and so now I am BACK!
So, here's what the dealio is: I move to Cincinnati at the end of this month for massage school. But before then, I have to organize my room, PACK my room, finish editing From Afar, send of 7 more letters to literary agents, get some more work done on To Love Again, and transfer all of my written novel notes into my computer so that I have all of the information in one place!
I think I might die.....
Oh, for those of you who are new to my writing schemes: From Afar is my first novel. It's all done, but there is still some editing and revising needed. It's the first in a series about the Birkham family, set in Regency England, but without the high-faluting mumbo-jumbo. It's told a lot like how my brain sees things and thinks things, so I find it pretty funny. To Love Again is the second book in the series, and is not even halfway done, which is BAD considering I wanted to have the first draft done by Halloween....might have to make that Thanksgiving..... If you want to know more about all of that stuff, email me at rebelconn@gmail.com. I'm ALWAYS more than happy to talk about these things!!!!
Right, I also have to find a job in Cincy. I just applied to one at the new hospital opening in Liberty in their Rehabilitation center, so we'll see. School starts on August 5th, so that will be exciting.
OH! And I also have to buy and read Breaking Dawn on August 2nd. Please don't call me that day, I won't answer. Or if I do, I might be issuing all sorts of mean, horrible, nasty threats that I may or may not follow through with, depending on how it ends and how many of you call.
Yes, I am a Twilight-aholic. So what? It's good stuff! GO EDWARD!
Anyway, that's my current life in a nutshell. Confused? So am I. But somehow I'll manage to connect all the various parts of me, and figure out who I am, what I am doing, and where it all will lead me. Wow, that sounds tiring. I think I'll have to pack some M&Ms for that...

Sunday, June 29, 2008

First day of Olympic Trials

Day one of adventures in Olympia:
Four of us (Chris, Erin, Sarah, and me) got to sit in the luxury boxes at the morning session, thanks to the generosity of Indiana Swimming, and so we were really close to the start of the races. At this meet they have what is called a clean deck, where no swimmers, coaches, or any other people but the officials can be on the deck of the pool during the races. Because of this, they march all of the swimmers in just before their heat, so it is REALLY cool.
Jenny swam the 100 meter butterfly today and was seeded 76th. She got a best time today and finished 53rd, so that is awesome!
Dad, Chris, Erin, and I went to the finals tonight, and for the first time, I saw world records get broken. Michael Phelps broke his in the 400 IM and Katie Hoff broke hers in the 400 IM. I also saw probably the best race ever in the 400 Free where three guys battled it out for the top two places, and all three went under the American record. It was soooooooo cool!
Jenny update: she is feeling really good. She's really excited for tomorrow and can't wait to get going. She really feels like she can do her best here, which makes us feel good too!
We're so proud of her and know that whatever she does tomorrow or Tuesday, assuming she makes the finals, will be her best, and she has represent her family, her team, and the Church in an amazing way. Thanks for all of your support!

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Tales of a Very Long Car Trip

After 9 hours in a 2005 Ford Taurus with my parents, I have arrived in Omaha, Nebraska, having felt enriched and a better American. After all, I had never been through Iowa, and never set foot in Nebraska, and now I have. Illinois and Indiana were nice, as well, and I am amazed at the differences in color between here and in the UK. The landscape is not SO different--a bit more hills and trees--but the color of said landscape is vastly different. The UK manages to have more vibrancy, and our colors of pastures and wildflowers and such is more pale. I don't mean to degrade our beloved States by any means, but the colors are litterally not as bright. The green here has more yellow in it, and the flowers have mroe white in them. Pure colors in the UK, blended colors here. Very interesting.
Also, people are strange here. We saw someone almost get crushed by a semi, and then at Subway there was an old woman who had her hair in curlers and in pins. I would have taken a picture, but discretion is not one of my strong points.
But, Jenny just called, and she has just landed. We are so excited for next week. She swims on Sunday, Monday, and, assuming she makes the finals of the 100m back, Tuesday night. She feels great, we feel nervous, and everything is going to be new and exciting. Man, I love the Olympics!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Jenny

When I woke up this morning and went to the kitchen for breakfast, I picked up the Sports section, and was a little startled to see my baby sister on the front page. Not too startled, mind, as she is the most famous athlete in Lafayette (a real privilege, that) and who else are they going to talk about this week? There was the beginning of a nice article about her and how the Olympic Trials are next week and how she's been training for years for this, etc, etc, etc. My mom sees my crazy grin, and says, "Wait til you look inside." I flip the page---and nothing. I looked up at her in confusion. She said, "Next page." So I shrugged and turned one more---and I screamed. Full page spread, color photos, Jenny Connolly Prepares For Olympic Trials. Captions under each pic, and on the other side there was the rest of the article about her. Then the listed "Other Olympic Hopefuls" that were in various other sports. But HOLY COW!!!! What a way to begin the Sabbath, eh? If you want to read the article/see the pics, go to www.jconline.com, and you can't miss it. But Jenny is amazing. She's not nervous; just really excited. She's seeded 7th right now, but we all know that Jenny is amazing on a taper, and she is so ready for this. Whether she makes the team or not, I'm already proud of her. We leave on Thursday for Omaha, and I am so excited!!!!
Here are some of the pics from the paper today:

She makes it look so easy, doesn't she?

I told her I was making this a poster, and she rolled her eyes at me.

I LOVE this one. Looks like something that should be in SI, huh?

Home Sweet Home

Yes, I am here. And the jetlag is amazing, and the unpacking has commenced. It is quite frightening, actually. There were more bags in my room than in the basement or my parent's closest combined. I have already filled three 18 gallon bins, and have scoured three different closets for the right number of hangers. This is what happens when you lose your room to a younger sibling and then move home after four years of independance. THEY STEAL YOUR STUFF AND YOU HAVE TO FEND FOR YOURSELF! But, on the upside, my mom has already paid for a new haircut (at Jenny's insistence--the haircut itself, not that Mom pay for it), two bins, a movie, refurbishing hygeine products, and photo printing. My gratitude knows no bounds...I just hope it lasts for the clothing restitution......



This is AFTER the unpacking. And the bed hides a multitude of sins. And don't forget the stuff in the hallway.....but the hair is cute, is it not?

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Day 50. The End.

“So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, good bye.” Well, gang, my time in London has come to an end. In 24 hours I will be at Heathrow Airport checking my bags, praying that they are not overweight, and then going through security and then waiting, waiting, waiting.
London has been amazing. I have seen things I never dreamed I would see. I have enjoyed every moment of it. There have been high times and hard times, but that’s the way it goes. I found this in one of my notebooks from a particularly bad day:
“I am living my dream and finding that my dream is not what I thought it would be. London is an experience, it is true, but not the one I would have chosen. I am continually disappointed, wishing for the London that I held on a pedestal. The London of Austen, of Radcliffe, of Bronte, of Dickens, of Shakespeare. The London of the Regent, of Waterloo, of Elizabeth, and Victoria. But that London is gone. The buildings are shells of what used to be, and if you keep your eyes looking up, you can almost imagine it. But you cannot look up forever, and then your reality sets in. The buildings you imagined fine lords and ladies inhabiting are now apartments above shops like RadioShack or Marks and Spencer or Anne’s Antiques. There are cars along the street and trucks humming along, nearly knocking you from your construction worked-over uneven walkway. People bustle by, not in their fine clothes or with their fine manners, but with their crass language and cigarettes, talking on cell phones and hardly noticing where they are walking. ‘This is not right,’ I think. ‘This is all wrong.’ It is too loud, too crowded, too dirty. Where are the carriages and footmen, the horses and stable hands? Where are propriety and manners and honor and chivalry? It is all too much, this London I am living in. Too much of what I have long hated all thrown into the sludge of shattered illusions and broken expectations. When did prices reach so high that you wince over a baguette? When did a lack of oxygen become commonplace in favor of smoke and exhaust and alcohol? When did mouths begin to venture where no respectable ear should endure?
This man used to live here, but now it is a car park. This writer wrote here, but now it houses an adult store. This artist is buried near here, but we can’t remember where. This church was once purely from the 10th century, but then it was a stable, but is now restored.
Used to be. But now. Near here. Once was. Don’t they realize what a legacy was to be had? “Have [they] no perception of what [they] have lost?” What is preserved and what is not? Where will tourists go and how much money can we make from them?
But what about the rest of us? We who are merely pilgrims seeking for what our imaginations had conjured up and treasured? “All that glitters is not gold.” Tarnish glitters, too. A feeble attempt, but a glitter all the same. My treasure is nothing more than that of a Cracker Jack box—a trite imitation, cheap and crude and not worth as much as the packaging it came in. Potential is everywhere, but it is left untapped.
Perhaps it is my fault. I should not expect so much from a place that must change with the times and alter as necessity dictates. Did I expect my imaginations to exist in reality, that what I wanted actually mattered to this place? My pedestal was too much, too high, too lofty, and there was nothing for it but to topple over and clatter upon the marble floor of the vault of my mind. My pilgrimage has changed me, though how I still cannot quite tell. There is still magic here, I am still drawn, but I also look back, more frequently with each day. Back to where I could dream and wonder and pretend that what I wanted existed and where my pedestals were of a respectable height of no great consequence. But Frodo was right: “There is no going back”. My imaginations have been eroded by reality. “Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.”

“Yet hope remains”! For in the wild not-so-hallowed halls of my mind, the imagination still roams free and reigns supreme. I can cast off this dirty, smelly, dingy shroud of this place and change it to a delicate, clean, innocent veil of something else. For what have we, if we cannot have dreams? “What would be the point of living if we could not dream? Life would be dull!” And though I am many things, dull is not one of them. So onward, ye daydreamers, ye artists and inventors and writers and wishers! “Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers, and me.” Tallyho!”

But let us remember what has been done:
Shows seen: 7
Universities visited: 3
Trips taken: 15
Chocolate consumed: No comment
Tubes rides: A whole lot
Friends made: 42
Lives changed: 1

London, thank you for housing me, sheltering me, enriching me, and showing me a part of the world that I never knew existed. Thanks for the waffles, the Indian food, the charity shops, the souvenir shops with scary foreign men, the sights, the sounds, not the smells, the accents, the palaces, and seeing random celebrities like Dustin Hoffman, Emma Thompson, Sean Connery, the woman who plays Caroline Bingley in the A&E Pride and Prejudice, the woman who plays Mrs. Elton in the Gwyneth Paltrow Emma, and the woman who plays Jane in the A&E Pride and Prejudice.Thank you, London. I’ll never forget.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Days 42-49

Well, it has been a few days.....ok, let's face it, it's been forever. I know you guys have been just crying your eyes out with anticipation over this, wondering where I was and what I was doing, and you weren't entirely sure if I were dead or alive or run away with a dashing British soldier. Alas to that last, I have not. Though I would not hesitate to do so if given the opportunity. Ok, so I am a little more picky than that, but still.....
Let me see if I can sum up what I have done. Last week we went to Oxford and Blenheim. Blenheim is the home of the 11th Earl of Marlborough, and was where Winston Churchill was born. Literally, I saw the room he was born in. I want to live in Blenheim. It is that cool. I love it.
Oxford University was awesome. So pretty and so old! We saw a couple of places where Harry Potter was filmed at Christ's Church College [basically, Oxford is the main univeristy with a bunch of college divisions, like our Schools of Technology and Family Sciences at home]. We saw the pub where J.R.R. Tolkein and C.S. Lewis and their pals used to go. It was so great!
Thursday we went on a Jack the Ripper Tour of London. CREEPY!!! Seriously, he was such a sick psycho! We got all of the gory details about the murders and walked where the bodies were found and learned about the victims and.....ech! Halloween ain't gonna be the same anymore! But it was SOOOOOO cool!!!! Especially when we found the exact door where one of the pieces of evidence were found....
Then on Friday we went on a 9 mile country walk (HAH!) in Kent. It was BEAUTIFUL! There was so much to see and I loved every minute. Mom and Lori, there was a place we went in called the Hop Shop where they sold a bunch of country things, kinda like a Cracker Barrel store, only cooler. But there was a lot of lavender stuff, mostly because they GROW THEIR OWN! We saw fields and fields of lavender. Amazing. I also got to try lavender ice cream, which is not as disgusting as it sounds. It was actually pretty good and rather refreshing!
Saturday I went to see "Gone With The Wind" the musical, which was closing that night because of poor ticket sales. I was surprised and saddened at the end that it was closing, because it was actually really good! The man who played Rhett Butler was amazing.....and really attractive to boot. And I LOVED the girl who played Scarlett. So much better than stinky ol' Vivian Leigh. I actually liked Scarlett a little in this production. I hope you guys know what I am talking about, or else I am just rambling on and on, and you'll get really bored.
ANYWAY, after that we've just been getting ready to come home and studying (yes, I did, thank you very much) for finals. But now, as of this morning, my finals are OVER!!!! I am officially done with Brigham Young University. It's been a fun ride, but this was the highlight.
I'll post one more time before I head back to the States, and then my blog will be far less exciting, but I hope to not lose any of my audience. I think I can make my life at least SOUND exciting....ok, maybe not. But Jenny's Olympic Trials are coming in a week and a half, so watch for updates and pics on that! If you want to send messages of encouragement, write my parents at bagafans@juno.com.
Cheerio, mates!
The View of Blenheim from the park. See why I want to live there? Too bad the oldest single member to inherit is 14.....
Yeah.....I'm a dork. BUT these are the stairs from Harry Potter. Tell me you wouldn't be a dork, too. They really do lead to the Dining Hall, too!

THE GREAT HALL! No, really, it's the dining hall at Christ's Church College at Oxford, but it really is the Great Hall from the first two Harry Potter movies!

At the Eagle and Child pub in Oxford in the Rabbit Room, where C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien ate and drank with their literary friends. Channelling greatness, here.

This was our Jack the Ripper Tour Guide named Adam. He was really funny!

One of the creepiest part of our Jack tour. East End of London, aka Hell of the 19th century. Not even kidding. Adam took us there and goes, "Let's all go to hell!" And it was a true statement!

Lovely little pasture we walked through in Kent.

So the guys who took us on the walk were really old, and they were brothers named Ron and George (not joking) and Ron asked me if I was brave enough to take my shoes and socks off and walk up the stream. Well, I couldn't let him think me a coward, so of course I took off my shoes and socks and did it. It was really cold and there were lots of rocks, but I did it! He was so proud.
Pretty...this was just like the rest of the walk. I love Kent!


Sigh, that was a really great show. I hope it comes to New York, cuz I want to go again!